Where to start, where to start....firstly I know I'm the slackest blogger and commentor in the whole blogging community, and chances are I will do this post and possibly not do another one for weeks or months, OR, maybe I will get the weekly urge to keep documenting life again...I hope that's the case!
So this will probably be a bullet point style post, really just some random thoughts about the last 4 months of motherhood and how my baby makes me smile :)
Okay so already I have gotten out of my seat, walked to the hallway door, and listened with my ear cocked (does that even happen for humans??!) for a peep from miss H...this will probably happen another 10 or so times before I finish!No one tells you that when you have a baby you hear your baby crying all the time- 98% of the time it's not actually them, somehow your brain converts the most unlikely sounds to baby cries!
Miss H is 4 months old tomorrow, sometimes it feels as though it has been a year since I had her....sometimes it feels like only 4 weeks ago. I do find it astounding that only 16 weeks ago this wee human entered into the world, having been confined to my belly for 9 months, and in that space of time has grown and learnt so much for such a short space of time.
She has the biggest wide open mouthed smile I've ever seen, I love it-it's like she's silent-laughing, cracking up but just hasn't learned how to add sound effects yet! She also now tries to copy 'kissing lips' -it's hilarious watching her try to purse her own lips.
I never thought I would feel so happy about baby poo but I do. Our girl is quite a poo-er, and tends to get quite a few upset tummies which are relieved once she goes. So I tend to get a huge amount of satisfaction on her behalf. Gross I know.
I'm still fully breastfeeding, but it hasn't been without struggles. I had to use nipple shields until about 8 weeks, and in her 16 short weeks of life I've had a recurring breast infection that has reappeared 7 times- the first day it appears is always the worse and I have a terrible headache and fever, and feel like giving up altogether.Once it starts clearing up I forget and think I will keep going for a few more months.The last flare-up was on Sunday, and I'm now on a long course of antibiotics 4 times a day in the hopes of getting rid of it once and for all. My original goal was to breastfeed for around 9months to a year, now I feel that I will still persevere and hope to reach those goals, but that it won't be the end of the world if I need to stop sooner-there's only so much my body and morale can take with these infections and happy mum=happy baby.
I took miss H out into the garden today for some fresh air, it was beautifully sunny, but with a fresh breeze. It took me quite a while to cotton onto the fact that she was gasping and getting excited with each little gust of wind that she felt, it made me smile and remember that so much is still brand new and eye-opening to this wee being.
I'm going to cut this post short now and head to bed, but hope to be back to add more to it or hey, maybe even write a new one!
xxx
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
The Birth.
This has taken me pretty much 4 weeks to type!In between feeds,naps and my darling girl, it's quite lengthy and a little too detailed but it's for my own record so bear with me-or skip past!! :)
Induction....
At our last Obstetrician appointment on the 22nd December they confirmed that I would be induced and set the date...it was bizarre how our lovely OB looked through her diary and picked a day as though she was scheduling a coffee date- it was to begin on the 27th December and we had to be at the hospital at 7.30am.
Panic stations sort of set in then, and I felt hugely anxious during my last 2 days at home, as we were packing up to leave our house and stay at mum&dad's house over Christmas and then for a week or so after the birth, so I had to try and make sure we had everything we needed for a new baby-when really I couldn't quite get my head around the fact it was going to happen in merely a few days!
Christmas and Boxing day are a blur...it was fairly low-key for our family this year, still lovely, but everyone was tired from the year that had been, and a little preoccupied with the fact that there would be a baby in the house very soon.
Hubby and I were packed and ready waiting at the hospital on the 27th...it was the start of a fairly long 2 days waiting for it all to start! They put the first lot of Prostoglandin gel in that morning, and the nurse-Judy, said things were looking very favourable already-cervix thin and 1-2cm, so she did a sweep then and there to help things along.
We also had the on-duty OB on his rounds come in and talk to us about what would be happening with the induction- I took an immediate dislike to him-his bedside manner was dreadful and he said he could see nothing wrong with our 37 week scan,and that he would have just left us to go full term, and made us feel as though we shouldn't have even been there...luckily he wasn't the OB that made the decision for us then, because looking back I'm extremely grateful they didn't let us go any longer!
I had mild pains that first day but they had disappeared by the next morning-we spent the day walking the hospital roof garden to try and keep the contractions going along, and eating snacks! Cue second lot of gel the next morning, and then another lot that evening too. They could feel baby's head right there on that second day but it wasn't locked into place and moved a bit when they pushed it so they couldn't break my waters to get things moving just yet. The second night I had stronger contractions- it's funny when I look back as I thought they were rather painful then and felt like things were moving along quite quickly-when really they were nothing!
Labour.....
On the morning of the 29th, the pains had died right off again, that same Dr I disliked was back on the rounds, and after feeling that baby's head was well and truly locked into place by now (the contractions from the night before must have helped move her right into position), he decided then and there to break my waters, which he did and it was painless, and then it was all on and while leaking amniotic fluid everywhere-we were moved into a delivery suite.This was at 8.30am.
They put me on a Syntocin drip which initially freaked me out as I thought I would be stuck on the bed unable to move, but they monitored baby internally for a while with a probe, so I was able to sit on the Swiss ball and move around a little.
Would you believe I hadn't even discussed a birth plan or pain relief with my midwife yet?! She was pretty relaxed though and that suited me just fine, so I really only made my decision about pain relief there and then. I'd had friends recommend asking for an epidural straight away seeing as I was on the Synto drip-as they cause contractions to come hard and fast. But I really hated the idea of it- I have no issues with pain relief itself, but personally I'm just not keen with anything being stuck into my spine, and not being able to feel anything when it came to pushing. My midwife helped me make my decision to use only gas, by telling me she had birthed twice on the Synto drip and only had gas both times, so I was determined to do the same!
.
The contractions came on pretty quickly once the drip was in, and after they had stepped up a notch I started feeling a little anxious about whether I really could make it through the whole birth with no other pain relief-the gas didn't feel like it did anything, although it at least gave me something to focus on with each pain.
This is also where the whole labour seems to merge into one event and I'm quite foggy about what happened when etc....basically the contractions got stronger, I can just remember sucking hard on the gas for each one, and they progressed in strength until I was emitting guttural moans at the end of each breath...it seemed to help with the pain actually.
I had always thought that being in labour would be like constant pain...despite knowing that contractions came and went. So I was surprised to find that after the ferocity of each one, once it had passed, I was able to lie back and talk and joke with DH and the midwife about perfectly normal stuff!
DH said afterwards that it was strange to see me in such pain one minute, and then quite normal the next-must have been bizarre for him! He tried to help as much as he could with rubbing my back etc, but really I don't think any of it actually helped with the pain, just having him there was all I needed.
I ended up vomiting with the pain at one point too- it must have been near full dilation because everything started moving quite quickly and seems like a blur in my memory now.
I reached 5-6 cm dilation pretty quickly, and then by around 2:30-3pm I was fully dilated and my midwife said I could start pushing.
I had DH on my right, another lovely midwife on my left (who's shift finished at 3:30 but she was determined to stay on and see our baby born as she wanted to see how long she was haha!) who both held my legs for leverage with each push, and my midwife was at the foot of the bed. I did my best with the pushing, and was meant to be doing 3-4 with each contraction- but I was finding that I just had no urge to push after the second one...this was because the contractions were starting to wear off-right when you need them the most!So they cranked up the drip which helped for a bit, and they could see baby's head coming back and forth but I just couldn't push her far enough past 'the bend' as they put it.
So eventually they decided I would need a Venthouse(suction cup)to help get her out, and a male Dr or OB was called in to assist.
He was this huge guy who looked like he would be more at home in a Boxing Ring than a delivery room, but SO lovely and I immediately felt at ease with him there.
The birth.... I remember reading in one of my baby/birth books about how you appear to 'lose the plot' once you reach transition stage of labour...and I now understand what that means! I can't really even remember enough to describe the actual sensation of having baby gently pulled through with the suction...I think it was just immense pressure and stretching-At one point my midwife asked me to pant, and then the head was out! It was here that I started to lose the plot and was making all sorts of strange little shrieking sounds- just because I could still feel that sensation of stretching and I KNEW my baby's head was just sitting there-it's the most bizarre thing!
They asked if I wanted to feel the head or have a look with a mirror but I knew if I did then I might start to freak out and I really just wanted her out at that stage....we waited until the next urge to push came, and then out came her body-it was still a tight sensation but the pain immediately disappeared once she was completely out.
Baby H was born at 3:59pm that day, weighing 8lb 10oz.
I forget which order that everything happened from here on....but the cord was cut, baby H was placed on my chest...and at some point they must have measured and checked her over-I remember seeing them do that but I'm not entirely sure when that was!I also had minimal tearing and a couple of stitches put in.
I couldn't quite believe that our baby was finally here, I couldn't even see her face yet- I just loved her, she was long, and beautiful, and our little giraffe- it's as though you know what they look like without even seeing them...if that makes sense.
While she was on my chest the OB started massaging my abdomen to try and get my uterus to contract and expel the placenta, I had also been given a shot of something in my thigh to help this along too. It was immensely painful- I'm not sure if that's normal or a precursor to what happened next, but I ended up sucking on the gas again as he was massaging my abdomen, I remember thinking 'my poor baby' as she was lying on my chest while I was in such pain and hoped she wasn't picking up on how awful it was! I couldn't even enjoy those moments with her unfortunately.
At some point they must have taken her off my chest...I remember feeling a huge gush, and then next minute I noticed there was about 10 people in the room, the OB had his hands down in my nether regions and had the phone wedged between his shoulder and ear saying they needed a theatre room urgently, and it couldn't wait. I had IV lines put in either arms, a shot of something on my thigh again....the whole thing was a bit surreal and I just remember feeling like my eyes were as big as saucers trying to take in what was going on around me- and no-one was actually telling me.
I could see DH with my midwife on the opposite side of the room-he had his back to me and was holding Harriet with his shoulders shaking...that's when I felt REALLY scared that something quite bad had happened and I was going to miss out on meeting my daughter after everything we had been through to get her.... DH and both of the midwives kissed me and told me they'd see me soon and I was wheeled out- hearing one of the nurses saying that we had left a trail of blood all the way to theatre.
Once I was in there the staff were lovely and made me feel a little more at ease-asking me about baby H and what we were going to name her etc...and then I was put under, and woke up 2 hours later in recovery.
Afterwards.... When I woke up I found out I had haemorrhaged while they were trying to get the placenta out- my uterus failed to contract, so I lost 2 Litres of blood, and also had some retained placenta which they removed while I was under anaesthetic.
The placenta was also apparently in a terrible state- which WAS picked up on the 37 week scan, and which is why I'm so scathing of the on-duty OB at the hospital who came and told us the induction was unnecessary.
Finally finally....my midwife came in and they wheeled me to my room where DH was waiting with our wee bundle all wrapped up. He had had skin to skin with her the whole time while he was waiting for me. My midwife left us alone for 10 minutes and I finally got to hold my baby on my chest-she was, and still is, the most beautiful baby I have ever seen- not biased of course!
I don't think I cried the whole time...it wasn't until 2 days later that it finally hit me, and then at a few odd times over the next couple of weeks.
It hit DH harder- I've been told the floor of the delivery room looked like a horror film-that's why he had his back to me when I saw him, and why our midwife tried to usher him out to wait in our room. He cried quite a bit on and off for that first 2 days.
My midwife said that most women would have been in bits after that sort of experience and she was surprised that I was handling it so well and bonding with H...I don't know that I handled it well as such...more that after everything we went through to get H, I was determined not to let that experience ruin any more of my time with my baby.
So, that's the birth story....I don't mean for it to sound so dramatic as I know that at the end of the day I had a healthy baby, and I came out of it okay- many people have much worse outcomes.
But it really did affect me quite a bit for the 2 weeks or so after she was born- I was smitten with her, but just felt like we had missed out on something huge by not having those first precious hours together. And with the trauma that my body had experienced it took longer than usual to produce any colostrum and then milk...I also had huge troubles trying to latch her on, so to add to everything our first week was a blur of formula,cup feeding,syringe feeding colostrum, and pumping madly, but we finally got there in the end and I'm fully breastfeeding with the help of nipple shields.
I know that is probably the longest most tedious post I have ever written, but I wanted to put as much detail in that I could remember for my own record of events...so I don't blame anyone for skipping through most of it....I'll probably end up adding more to it too!
Apart from the haemorrhage- the actual labour and birth was amazing- above and beyond anything I had ever expected. It still astounds me what my body was able to do that day, and just the fact that we have this darling little person that we actually made....and then I remember just how she was made, and feel even more amazed!From an 8 cell embryo to this wonderful little character- it blows us away each and every day.
Induction....
At our last Obstetrician appointment on the 22nd December they confirmed that I would be induced and set the date...it was bizarre how our lovely OB looked through her diary and picked a day as though she was scheduling a coffee date- it was to begin on the 27th December and we had to be at the hospital at 7.30am.
Panic stations sort of set in then, and I felt hugely anxious during my last 2 days at home, as we were packing up to leave our house and stay at mum&dad's house over Christmas and then for a week or so after the birth, so I had to try and make sure we had everything we needed for a new baby-when really I couldn't quite get my head around the fact it was going to happen in merely a few days!
Christmas and Boxing day are a blur...it was fairly low-key for our family this year, still lovely, but everyone was tired from the year that had been, and a little preoccupied with the fact that there would be a baby in the house very soon.
Hubby and I were packed and ready waiting at the hospital on the 27th...it was the start of a fairly long 2 days waiting for it all to start! They put the first lot of Prostoglandin gel in that morning, and the nurse-Judy, said things were looking very favourable already-cervix thin and 1-2cm, so she did a sweep then and there to help things along.
We also had the on-duty OB on his rounds come in and talk to us about what would be happening with the induction- I took an immediate dislike to him-his bedside manner was dreadful and he said he could see nothing wrong with our 37 week scan,and that he would have just left us to go full term, and made us feel as though we shouldn't have even been there...luckily he wasn't the OB that made the decision for us then, because looking back I'm extremely grateful they didn't let us go any longer!
I had mild pains that first day but they had disappeared by the next morning-we spent the day walking the hospital roof garden to try and keep the contractions going along, and eating snacks! Cue second lot of gel the next morning, and then another lot that evening too. They could feel baby's head right there on that second day but it wasn't locked into place and moved a bit when they pushed it so they couldn't break my waters to get things moving just yet. The second night I had stronger contractions- it's funny when I look back as I thought they were rather painful then and felt like things were moving along quite quickly-when really they were nothing!
Labour.....
On the morning of the 29th, the pains had died right off again, that same Dr I disliked was back on the rounds, and after feeling that baby's head was well and truly locked into place by now (the contractions from the night before must have helped move her right into position), he decided then and there to break my waters, which he did and it was painless, and then it was all on and while leaking amniotic fluid everywhere-we were moved into a delivery suite.This was at 8.30am.
They put me on a Syntocin drip which initially freaked me out as I thought I would be stuck on the bed unable to move, but they monitored baby internally for a while with a probe, so I was able to sit on the Swiss ball and move around a little.
Would you believe I hadn't even discussed a birth plan or pain relief with my midwife yet?! She was pretty relaxed though and that suited me just fine, so I really only made my decision about pain relief there and then. I'd had friends recommend asking for an epidural straight away seeing as I was on the Synto drip-as they cause contractions to come hard and fast. But I really hated the idea of it- I have no issues with pain relief itself, but personally I'm just not keen with anything being stuck into my spine, and not being able to feel anything when it came to pushing. My midwife helped me make my decision to use only gas, by telling me she had birthed twice on the Synto drip and only had gas both times, so I was determined to do the same!
.
The contractions came on pretty quickly once the drip was in, and after they had stepped up a notch I started feeling a little anxious about whether I really could make it through the whole birth with no other pain relief-the gas didn't feel like it did anything, although it at least gave me something to focus on with each pain.
This is also where the whole labour seems to merge into one event and I'm quite foggy about what happened when etc....basically the contractions got stronger, I can just remember sucking hard on the gas for each one, and they progressed in strength until I was emitting guttural moans at the end of each breath...it seemed to help with the pain actually.
I had always thought that being in labour would be like constant pain...despite knowing that contractions came and went. So I was surprised to find that after the ferocity of each one, once it had passed, I was able to lie back and talk and joke with DH and the midwife about perfectly normal stuff!
DH said afterwards that it was strange to see me in such pain one minute, and then quite normal the next-must have been bizarre for him! He tried to help as much as he could with rubbing my back etc, but really I don't think any of it actually helped with the pain, just having him there was all I needed.
I ended up vomiting with the pain at one point too- it must have been near full dilation because everything started moving quite quickly and seems like a blur in my memory now.
I reached 5-6 cm dilation pretty quickly, and then by around 2:30-3pm I was fully dilated and my midwife said I could start pushing.
I had DH on my right, another lovely midwife on my left (who's shift finished at 3:30 but she was determined to stay on and see our baby born as she wanted to see how long she was haha!) who both held my legs for leverage with each push, and my midwife was at the foot of the bed. I did my best with the pushing, and was meant to be doing 3-4 with each contraction- but I was finding that I just had no urge to push after the second one...this was because the contractions were starting to wear off-right when you need them the most!So they cranked up the drip which helped for a bit, and they could see baby's head coming back and forth but I just couldn't push her far enough past 'the bend' as they put it.
So eventually they decided I would need a Venthouse(suction cup)to help get her out, and a male Dr or OB was called in to assist.
He was this huge guy who looked like he would be more at home in a Boxing Ring than a delivery room, but SO lovely and I immediately felt at ease with him there.
The birth.... I remember reading in one of my baby/birth books about how you appear to 'lose the plot' once you reach transition stage of labour...and I now understand what that means! I can't really even remember enough to describe the actual sensation of having baby gently pulled through with the suction...I think it was just immense pressure and stretching-At one point my midwife asked me to pant, and then the head was out! It was here that I started to lose the plot and was making all sorts of strange little shrieking sounds- just because I could still feel that sensation of stretching and I KNEW my baby's head was just sitting there-it's the most bizarre thing!
They asked if I wanted to feel the head or have a look with a mirror but I knew if I did then I might start to freak out and I really just wanted her out at that stage....we waited until the next urge to push came, and then out came her body-it was still a tight sensation but the pain immediately disappeared once she was completely out.
Baby H was born at 3:59pm that day, weighing 8lb 10oz.
I forget which order that everything happened from here on....but the cord was cut, baby H was placed on my chest...and at some point they must have measured and checked her over-I remember seeing them do that but I'm not entirely sure when that was!I also had minimal tearing and a couple of stitches put in.
I couldn't quite believe that our baby was finally here, I couldn't even see her face yet- I just loved her, she was long, and beautiful, and our little giraffe- it's as though you know what they look like without even seeing them...if that makes sense.
While she was on my chest the OB started massaging my abdomen to try and get my uterus to contract and expel the placenta, I had also been given a shot of something in my thigh to help this along too. It was immensely painful- I'm not sure if that's normal or a precursor to what happened next, but I ended up sucking on the gas again as he was massaging my abdomen, I remember thinking 'my poor baby' as she was lying on my chest while I was in such pain and hoped she wasn't picking up on how awful it was! I couldn't even enjoy those moments with her unfortunately.
At some point they must have taken her off my chest...I remember feeling a huge gush, and then next minute I noticed there was about 10 people in the room, the OB had his hands down in my nether regions and had the phone wedged between his shoulder and ear saying they needed a theatre room urgently, and it couldn't wait. I had IV lines put in either arms, a shot of something on my thigh again....the whole thing was a bit surreal and I just remember feeling like my eyes were as big as saucers trying to take in what was going on around me- and no-one was actually telling me.
I could see DH with my midwife on the opposite side of the room-he had his back to me and was holding Harriet with his shoulders shaking...that's when I felt REALLY scared that something quite bad had happened and I was going to miss out on meeting my daughter after everything we had been through to get her.... DH and both of the midwives kissed me and told me they'd see me soon and I was wheeled out- hearing one of the nurses saying that we had left a trail of blood all the way to theatre.
Once I was in there the staff were lovely and made me feel a little more at ease-asking me about baby H and what we were going to name her etc...and then I was put under, and woke up 2 hours later in recovery.
Afterwards.... When I woke up I found out I had haemorrhaged while they were trying to get the placenta out- my uterus failed to contract, so I lost 2 Litres of blood, and also had some retained placenta which they removed while I was under anaesthetic.
The placenta was also apparently in a terrible state- which WAS picked up on the 37 week scan, and which is why I'm so scathing of the on-duty OB at the hospital who came and told us the induction was unnecessary.
Finally finally....my midwife came in and they wheeled me to my room where DH was waiting with our wee bundle all wrapped up. He had had skin to skin with her the whole time while he was waiting for me. My midwife left us alone for 10 minutes and I finally got to hold my baby on my chest-she was, and still is, the most beautiful baby I have ever seen- not biased of course!
I don't think I cried the whole time...it wasn't until 2 days later that it finally hit me, and then at a few odd times over the next couple of weeks.
It hit DH harder- I've been told the floor of the delivery room looked like a horror film-that's why he had his back to me when I saw him, and why our midwife tried to usher him out to wait in our room. He cried quite a bit on and off for that first 2 days.
My midwife said that most women would have been in bits after that sort of experience and she was surprised that I was handling it so well and bonding with H...I don't know that I handled it well as such...more that after everything we went through to get H, I was determined not to let that experience ruin any more of my time with my baby.
So, that's the birth story....I don't mean for it to sound so dramatic as I know that at the end of the day I had a healthy baby, and I came out of it okay- many people have much worse outcomes.
But it really did affect me quite a bit for the 2 weeks or so after she was born- I was smitten with her, but just felt like we had missed out on something huge by not having those first precious hours together. And with the trauma that my body had experienced it took longer than usual to produce any colostrum and then milk...I also had huge troubles trying to latch her on, so to add to everything our first week was a blur of formula,cup feeding,syringe feeding colostrum, and pumping madly, but we finally got there in the end and I'm fully breastfeeding with the help of nipple shields.
I know that is probably the longest most tedious post I have ever written, but I wanted to put as much detail in that I could remember for my own record of events...so I don't blame anyone for skipping through most of it....I'll probably end up adding more to it too!
Apart from the haemorrhage- the actual labour and birth was amazing- above and beyond anything I had ever expected. It still astounds me what my body was able to do that day, and just the fact that we have this darling little person that we actually made....and then I remember just how she was made, and feel even more amazed!From an 8 cell embryo to this wonderful little character- it blows us away each and every day.
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
She's here.... :)
Introducing my darling Baby Giraffe...born 29th December, 8lb 10oz, and a whopping 61cm long!
Sorry I haven't been on here to update yet....it has been a huge couple of weeks and has taken me a wee while to recover from the birth....my good friend Haidee suggested I write down the birth story as a therapeutic measure so I have decided to start doing that and it will be my next post- it was a bit of a birth of extremes-big highs and big lows and it did actually leave me a wee bit emotionally shaken.
Baby G is just lovely though and we are slowly feeling our way into parenthood. As my husband said she is a little heart melter, and it's pretty amazing to see how much she is changing day by day already! :)
I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas and New Year and I'm looking forward to a marathon catch-up session on blogger at some stage!
xoxo
Monday, December 19, 2011
Almost there....
This post may be short and sweet, I'm not sure, I feel very rusty in terms of blogging these days so I'll see what spews forth from my slightly overloaded preggy brain.
I'm 38 weeks tomorrow- honestly, the 3rd trimester has absolutely flown by. I know there's still 2 weeks until the 'official' due date but I feel like I'm there already-or maybe I just feel like baby girl is ready to come out.
We had our last scan at 37 weeks, according to her measurements she was about 7lb 12 already...although the scanner said this is mostly due to her thigh measurement-which seriously,is off the charts-it didn't even register on the 'normal baby' measurement chart. So I really am having a baby giraffe!
Pepe was also practising her breathing while she was being scanned....G and I have been wondering for weeks what this strange up&down movement was that she's been doing, I knew it wasn't hiccups or anything, so that's that mystery solved-she's trying out her breathing skills!
She also said the placenta is showing signs of having done it's job-in other words a bit of wear and tear, so with that in mind I'm thinking at the next OB appointment on Thursday they may decide to set a date for induction-I actually can't wait to find out- whether they do induce or decide to leave it and monitor me instead ,I don't mind-I just want to know!
I can't imagine having gone through this whole pregnancy without all of the scans, OB appointments, and reassurances from other IVF buddies...as much as I would love to have one of those pregnancies where you sail through blissfully unaware of anything but baby's movements in your belly-I think that after everything we go through to get here, constant reassurance is just part and parcel of it.
In saying that though, I think these have been the best weeks, in fact, apart from the shaky start, I have in all honesty LOVED being pregnant, I love feeling her move around, the kicks in the ribs, my big belly, the daydreaming about what she looks like and the moment that we get to meet her. I wonder if I would have been so appreciative of it all had we not gone through what we did?
So we are almost ready, almost prepared, this week will be a busy one doing washing,cleaning the house,and making meals in preparation for our first week home with pepe. At the end of this week we're heading to my parents house to spend Christmas and New Year and basically wait out baby's arrival, then a few days at their house with baby, and then we head home as a wee family :)
So I'll finish with a 37 week bump photo...and who knows, the next photo may be of our baby girl!
I also want to wish everyone a joyous Christmas....and to everyone who is still struggling on their journeys -I hope that 2012 is the year that your dreams are realised...xxx
I'm 38 weeks tomorrow- honestly, the 3rd trimester has absolutely flown by. I know there's still 2 weeks until the 'official' due date but I feel like I'm there already-or maybe I just feel like baby girl is ready to come out.
We had our last scan at 37 weeks, according to her measurements she was about 7lb 12 already...although the scanner said this is mostly due to her thigh measurement-which seriously,is off the charts-it didn't even register on the 'normal baby' measurement chart. So I really am having a baby giraffe!
Pepe was also practising her breathing while she was being scanned....G and I have been wondering for weeks what this strange up&down movement was that she's been doing, I knew it wasn't hiccups or anything, so that's that mystery solved-she's trying out her breathing skills!
She also said the placenta is showing signs of having done it's job-in other words a bit of wear and tear, so with that in mind I'm thinking at the next OB appointment on Thursday they may decide to set a date for induction-I actually can't wait to find out- whether they do induce or decide to leave it and monitor me instead ,I don't mind-I just want to know!
I can't imagine having gone through this whole pregnancy without all of the scans, OB appointments, and reassurances from other IVF buddies...as much as I would love to have one of those pregnancies where you sail through blissfully unaware of anything but baby's movements in your belly-I think that after everything we go through to get here, constant reassurance is just part and parcel of it.
In saying that though, I think these have been the best weeks, in fact, apart from the shaky start, I have in all honesty LOVED being pregnant, I love feeling her move around, the kicks in the ribs, my big belly, the daydreaming about what she looks like and the moment that we get to meet her. I wonder if I would have been so appreciative of it all had we not gone through what we did?
So we are almost ready, almost prepared, this week will be a busy one doing washing,cleaning the house,and making meals in preparation for our first week home with pepe. At the end of this week we're heading to my parents house to spend Christmas and New Year and basically wait out baby's arrival, then a few days at their house with baby, and then we head home as a wee family :)
So I'll finish with a 37 week bump photo...and who knows, the next photo may be of our baby girl!
I also want to wish everyone a joyous Christmas....and to everyone who is still struggling on their journeys -I hope that 2012 is the year that your dreams are realised...xxx
Thursday, November 3, 2011
31 weeks-eek!
I'm a little bit shocked to look back and see that I seem to have only done one post a month for the past couple of months...it doesn't really feel that way though. I think I have an internal dialogue going constantly anyway so I FEEL like I'm blogging more...but anyway I've tried to keep up with commenting on some of the regular blogs I follow, I guess I just don't always have a lot to blog about myself!
Sooo...November update:
I'm 31 weeks pregnant now- and just starting to feel a teeny bit panicked at how time seems to be flying by.
I think partly this is because G has been finishing up with his degree so almost every waking moment for him has been working and studying (his last exam is TODAY-woohoo!) and I don't mind that in the least- he's been so attentive whenever possible and will always grab the chance to talk to baby or feel her move around, but it's just nearing the end of what has been a crazy busy last 3 years-and we are both absolutely exhausted now. And although we almost have everything we need for baby- at the moment it's all sitting in her room in piles and boxes on the floor!
So G's mission in the next couple of weeks (with no more study to do hurray!) is to re-assemble shelves for baby's room, which are still in pieces from our move here, and also put together the change-table, and then we can both potter and organize.
Because we're renting this house, there will be no major renovations or painting jobs happening- in fact baby's room will be a bit of a mish-mash-mostly old furniture and borrowed things, but it will be HERS and I just can't wait to actually bring her home, and that's all that matters.
G and I had our first antenatal class the other night, there's actually a really nice bunch there so we enjoyed it, and I think we'll have a nice group to keep in touch with once all our babies have arrived-and our baby is due first out of everyone.
I'm also preeeetty sure that the couple opposite us maybe went through IVF too....they didn't make it obvious but the husband was asking lots of questions about induction, and in NZ there seems to be this 'thing' about not letting IVF babies go past the due date-meaning they will induce you on, or around your due date.
There has been talk of doing this for us too. So my IVF-tennae perked up when I heard that. Of course I could be completely wrong but don't you reckon we develop a sixth sense about other IFers?
And G also discovered that one of the girls there was from the city he grew up in, they went to Intermediate school together and she's a bridesmaid at his best friend's wedding December! They are living not far from us and seem really nice, so we will keep in touch with them too.
And the most exciting thing that has happened for me this week was being able to meet up with the lovely Haidee from MaybeBaby-Or maybe the Loony bin, and her lovely wee boy Cohen who is just so cute! Hopefully next time we meet up we'll have our husbands in tow too- and I'll also have a little playmate for Cohen with me!
And on a finishing note- here is my pepe's first ever Halloween costume- I had a friend's party to go to so my sister painted my belly for me :)
Sooo...November update:
I'm 31 weeks pregnant now- and just starting to feel a teeny bit panicked at how time seems to be flying by.
I think partly this is because G has been finishing up with his degree so almost every waking moment for him has been working and studying (his last exam is TODAY-woohoo!) and I don't mind that in the least- he's been so attentive whenever possible and will always grab the chance to talk to baby or feel her move around, but it's just nearing the end of what has been a crazy busy last 3 years-and we are both absolutely exhausted now. And although we almost have everything we need for baby- at the moment it's all sitting in her room in piles and boxes on the floor!
So G's mission in the next couple of weeks (with no more study to do hurray!) is to re-assemble shelves for baby's room, which are still in pieces from our move here, and also put together the change-table, and then we can both potter and organize.
Because we're renting this house, there will be no major renovations or painting jobs happening- in fact baby's room will be a bit of a mish-mash-mostly old furniture and borrowed things, but it will be HERS and I just can't wait to actually bring her home, and that's all that matters.
G and I had our first antenatal class the other night, there's actually a really nice bunch there so we enjoyed it, and I think we'll have a nice group to keep in touch with once all our babies have arrived-and our baby is due first out of everyone.
I'm also preeeetty sure that the couple opposite us maybe went through IVF too....they didn't make it obvious but the husband was asking lots of questions about induction, and in NZ there seems to be this 'thing' about not letting IVF babies go past the due date-meaning they will induce you on, or around your due date.
There has been talk of doing this for us too. So my IVF-tennae perked up when I heard that. Of course I could be completely wrong but don't you reckon we develop a sixth sense about other IFers?
And G also discovered that one of the girls there was from the city he grew up in, they went to Intermediate school together and she's a bridesmaid at his best friend's wedding December! They are living not far from us and seem really nice, so we will keep in touch with them too.
And the most exciting thing that has happened for me this week was being able to meet up with the lovely Haidee from MaybeBaby-Or maybe the Loony bin, and her lovely wee boy Cohen who is just so cute! Hopefully next time we meet up we'll have our husbands in tow too- and I'll also have a little playmate for Cohen with me!
And on a finishing note- here is my pepe's first ever Halloween costume- I had a friend's party to go to so my sister painted my belly for me :)
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Textbook case.
I think after having a not-so textbook road to conceiving, and a not-so textbook first trimester...I'm discovering that I have recently been following the path of a textbook pregnancy.
I know this because the pregnancy textbook tells me so.
I have to admit the last trimester I stopped devouring my pregnancy books so much and just went with it for a while, but now I'm fascinated again to see how big baby is supposed to be and what she's doing, and I'm finding along the way that all of these niggles and weird ailments that I've had are actually pregnancy related. And I seem to open to a page and the very thing that I have been telling G about is right there in black&white in front of me.
For instance- me to G..."I think I'm getting that Carpal Tunnel Syndrome thingy-my wrist is killing me everytime I try and wring out the dishcloth" I then open a pregnancy book that very night, to read about what baby is up to in week 28, and find that in fact temporary Carpal Tunnel is actually related to pregnancy?!Something to do with your wrists swelling up I believe.
Me to G- "I think we need to change washing powders-my legs are itching like f#@k at the moment in bed and I'm sure it's the sheets!"
Again-a few days later I read another update in the book for week 29 and find that "Restless leg Syndrome" which I have also been having, can include uncontrollable twitching, itching and the feeling of crawling on your legs. So that explains that then (and also drew me a little sympathy from G who was most unsympathetic at the time when I was wriggling and twitching around in bed like a freakin centipede)
It's almost spooky how well timed these little things are compared to the book-and it's not Psychosomatic I swear because I'm reading about these things AFTER I experience them. I've also discovered that the migraines I've experienced, the weird skin rash on my wrist, and the feelings of MS returning are all normal preggy things too-who knew?
It may sound like I'm falling apart right now but in all honesty I'm feeling great- these are all small niggles that apparently most people experience and the good stuff by far outweighs all of them.
Baby girl is moving around heaps- not so many little kicks now but huge movements, big rolls and punching like movements. G and I watch my whole belly move in amazement- I think feeling her move is the best thing ever. Although it can feel really bizarre when she moves down low.
Just over 29 weeks now and we're getting super excited-11 weeks seems so soon and yet so far away at the same time. My mum has been knitting up a storm-the cutest little outfits you have ever seen, and she's also just finished her last chemo session yay!
She's so thrilled that that part is over, and now just has 6 weeks of radiotherapy beginning soon, and then it's all over just in time to meet her first grandbaby. Her hair is growing back now too- she used to have blonde curly hair but apparently it can grow back quite differently, so at the moment it's still very short but grey-and we're waiting to see if the curls come back! She actually looks amazing though, the short grey hair suits her I think!
So the last thing to update is the bump- I'm pretty sure this is my first ever bump shot on here?!
This was actually taken at just over 26 weeks I think,so belly is a little bigger now..
Not the best photo but all of the others have my head in them and I can't work out how to crop them!
I know this because the pregnancy textbook tells me so.
I have to admit the last trimester I stopped devouring my pregnancy books so much and just went with it for a while, but now I'm fascinated again to see how big baby is supposed to be and what she's doing, and I'm finding along the way that all of these niggles and weird ailments that I've had are actually pregnancy related. And I seem to open to a page and the very thing that I have been telling G about is right there in black&white in front of me.
For instance- me to G..."I think I'm getting that Carpal Tunnel Syndrome thingy-my wrist is killing me everytime I try and wring out the dishcloth" I then open a pregnancy book that very night, to read about what baby is up to in week 28, and find that in fact temporary Carpal Tunnel is actually related to pregnancy?!Something to do with your wrists swelling up I believe.
Me to G- "I think we need to change washing powders-my legs are itching like f#@k at the moment in bed and I'm sure it's the sheets!"
Again-a few days later I read another update in the book for week 29 and find that "Restless leg Syndrome" which I have also been having, can include uncontrollable twitching, itching and the feeling of crawling on your legs. So that explains that then (and also drew me a little sympathy from G who was most unsympathetic at the time when I was wriggling and twitching around in bed like a freakin centipede)
It's almost spooky how well timed these little things are compared to the book-and it's not Psychosomatic I swear because I'm reading about these things AFTER I experience them. I've also discovered that the migraines I've experienced, the weird skin rash on my wrist, and the feelings of MS returning are all normal preggy things too-who knew?
It may sound like I'm falling apart right now but in all honesty I'm feeling great- these are all small niggles that apparently most people experience and the good stuff by far outweighs all of them.
Baby girl is moving around heaps- not so many little kicks now but huge movements, big rolls and punching like movements. G and I watch my whole belly move in amazement- I think feeling her move is the best thing ever. Although it can feel really bizarre when she moves down low.
Just over 29 weeks now and we're getting super excited-11 weeks seems so soon and yet so far away at the same time. My mum has been knitting up a storm-the cutest little outfits you have ever seen, and she's also just finished her last chemo session yay!
She's so thrilled that that part is over, and now just has 6 weeks of radiotherapy beginning soon, and then it's all over just in time to meet her first grandbaby. Her hair is growing back now too- she used to have blonde curly hair but apparently it can grow back quite differently, so at the moment it's still very short but grey-and we're waiting to see if the curls come back! She actually looks amazing though, the short grey hair suits her I think!
So the last thing to update is the bump- I'm pretty sure this is my first ever bump shot on here?!
This was actually taken at just over 26 weeks I think,so belly is a little bigger now..
Not the best photo but all of the others have my head in them and I can't work out how to crop them!
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
cookies and other ramblings.
Well I'm now well and truly settled in our new place-I've MADE myself go out and explore the town a little bit, and I have more plans up my sleeve to start integrating myself into this new place a little more.
Number one starts today- we have loads of lovely neighbours around us, one couple are in a house just across from us, the wife looks only a couple of years older than me, and they have a 2 year old girl and a baby boy about 3 month old. We actually met them briefly when we moved in and she seemed lovely, but since then I've been a little people-shy....so I have decided today I would do something about it, and I'm going to take over some cookies that I baked last night.
I only made about 100 cookies-seriously. I decided I would bake some for G seeing as I'm going away this weekend and I got a little too excited on my mission and ended up doing 3 batches worth, chocolate chunk and ginger, and chocolate and cherry. I guess I just thought I may as save on electricity using the oven, and as a bonus only have to clean up my baking mess once-instead of 3 times.
I'm not known for my tidy cooking, G thinks it's very funny (and perhaps a little frustrating but he doesn't complain too much-not if he wants to be chief sampler and bowl scraper anyway...) He calls me 'The mess-maker', and as hard as I try to keep things tidy while I'm baking, I just can't do it. I tell myself it's a sign of a creative cook, but actually I think it's just sheer clumsiness and terrible flour-pouring skills- It's simply impossible for me to pour a cup of flour without ending up with half of it on the bench, and more than a few spoonfuls in my hair.
But despite the carnage in the kitchen afterwards, I generally manage to produce some pretty nice eats if I do say so myself!
I'm heading home this Friday and then being driven up to Auckland with my parents for the weekend. Mum and I are going to a pregnancy/baby/children's event. Tons of different stalls and products and specials on things, so should be a fun (and possibly expensive) day! And we're staying with my 91 year old Grandad, who I love to bits and haven't seen for a couple of months so I'm looking forward to that too.
It's my second weekend away in fact, last weekend I went back home for a friend's 30th and stayed 2 nights with mum&dad. I missed G but let me tell you-there's nothing like being at home sometimes. It's so cosy and in a way I feel like a little girl again sometimes. My dad even brought me breakfast in bed on the morning I left!
Otherwise apart from growing a baby I haven't been doing too much else lately-although I've had some sewing work from friends and family and also have a job to make chair covers next week so that will keep me busy. And in between I've been making bags and cushion covers, trying to build up a collection to do a craft market at the end of the year, I have 4 covers and 2 bags so far-not much but they're fairly labour intensive with gathers, linings, zip closures etc so I figure it's a good start.
And 26 weeks pregnant now- pepe is doing well and still moving around constantly- I love it, although some of the kicks *ahem* 'down low' can feel a little strange sometimes! I see an OB in 2 weeks time and then another scan at 32 week- and after that I'm imagining time is going to start moving verrry quickly.
We're slowly building up a collection of baby gear,some new things, but a lot of it's second-hand and in good condition, and mum has been a top bargain hunter at charity shops-bringing home some gorgeous little outfits for between $1-$4 each! And much more shopping to come at the baby show this weekend I think :)
Well I know this has been a weird rambling sort of post that goes nowhere, but that's where I'm at at the moment. Hopefully will have a bump shot to come soon too!
Number one starts today- we have loads of lovely neighbours around us, one couple are in a house just across from us, the wife looks only a couple of years older than me, and they have a 2 year old girl and a baby boy about 3 month old. We actually met them briefly when we moved in and she seemed lovely, but since then I've been a little people-shy....so I have decided today I would do something about it, and I'm going to take over some cookies that I baked last night.
I only made about 100 cookies-seriously. I decided I would bake some for G seeing as I'm going away this weekend and I got a little too excited on my mission and ended up doing 3 batches worth, chocolate chunk and ginger, and chocolate and cherry. I guess I just thought I may as save on electricity using the oven, and as a bonus only have to clean up my baking mess once-instead of 3 times.
I'm not known for my tidy cooking, G thinks it's very funny (and perhaps a little frustrating but he doesn't complain too much-not if he wants to be chief sampler and bowl scraper anyway...) He calls me 'The mess-maker', and as hard as I try to keep things tidy while I'm baking, I just can't do it. I tell myself it's a sign of a creative cook, but actually I think it's just sheer clumsiness and terrible flour-pouring skills- It's simply impossible for me to pour a cup of flour without ending up with half of it on the bench, and more than a few spoonfuls in my hair.
But despite the carnage in the kitchen afterwards, I generally manage to produce some pretty nice eats if I do say so myself!
I'm heading home this Friday and then being driven up to Auckland with my parents for the weekend. Mum and I are going to a pregnancy/baby/children's event. Tons of different stalls and products and specials on things, so should be a fun (and possibly expensive) day! And we're staying with my 91 year old Grandad, who I love to bits and haven't seen for a couple of months so I'm looking forward to that too.
It's my second weekend away in fact, last weekend I went back home for a friend's 30th and stayed 2 nights with mum&dad. I missed G but let me tell you-there's nothing like being at home sometimes. It's so cosy and in a way I feel like a little girl again sometimes. My dad even brought me breakfast in bed on the morning I left!
Otherwise apart from growing a baby I haven't been doing too much else lately-although I've had some sewing work from friends and family and also have a job to make chair covers next week so that will keep me busy. And in between I've been making bags and cushion covers, trying to build up a collection to do a craft market at the end of the year, I have 4 covers and 2 bags so far-not much but they're fairly labour intensive with gathers, linings, zip closures etc so I figure it's a good start.
And 26 weeks pregnant now- pepe is doing well and still moving around constantly- I love it, although some of the kicks *ahem* 'down low' can feel a little strange sometimes! I see an OB in 2 weeks time and then another scan at 32 week- and after that I'm imagining time is going to start moving verrry quickly.
We're slowly building up a collection of baby gear,some new things, but a lot of it's second-hand and in good condition, and mum has been a top bargain hunter at charity shops-bringing home some gorgeous little outfits for between $1-$4 each! And much more shopping to come at the baby show this weekend I think :)
Well I know this has been a weird rambling sort of post that goes nowhere, but that's where I'm at at the moment. Hopefully will have a bump shot to come soon too!
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