aaaand life is good again

So after my not-so-fantastic week, I've crawled back up my positive ladder and feeling preeetty good again,apart from the odd moment. I'm really really trying hard to not let any bad thoughts come into my mind. A few times I've found myself playing out some worst case scenarios in my head, it's almost a subconscious thing, and then as soon as I realise I'm doing it I'm trying hard to quash those thoughts and just focus on getting through the next month.
Last week when I was having a little moment G said to me to stop focusing on what everyone else is doing with their lives (in terms of friends falling pregnant left right and centre) and just focus on us and our own journey.So I'm trying to do that, and he's right, we have our own future to worry about and I need to stop fretting about things I have no control over.

I had my best friends Baby Shower to go to on Saturday, and I was hoping I wasn't going to be in a funny mood for that after the week I'd had, but I ended up having a great time. I went around early yesterday to help her and her mum set up and do the food, my friend looked every inch a beautiful mummy-to-be, and everyone just had a great time chatting and catching up.
The only time I really thought about IF was when she opened a gift that was a cute little bodysuit with   'made by nature'  on the front, and I thought to myself that my baby would have to have 'made by science' on the front. But it wasn't a bad moment, merely an observation to myself!

I am still counting down the days though....next AF is due on the 15th of Feb. I think I should invent an infertility advent calendar, what do ya reckon? Counting down the last month before an IUI, FET or IVF. And none of this teeny tiny sliver of chocolate business, my advent calendar will have big rewards baby, we deserve it with all of this endless bloody waiting. Windows that are big enough to fit a bottle of wine or giant toblerone should suffice!